


if all our defenses come down

by plain_and_simple_tailor (ectogeo)



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Canon Compliant, Episode Related, Episode: s03e07 Civil Defense, First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M, Missing Scene, POV Julian Bashir
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 10:35:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29169690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ectogeo/pseuds/plain_and_simple_tailor
Summary: Garak refuses to leave Julian’s side, even as the station’s self-destruct sequence counts down. (A missing scene set during the station evacuation at the end of the episode Civil Defense.)(Written for the Star Trek Just in Time fest.)
Relationships: Julian Bashir/Elim Garak
Comments: 24
Kudos: 98
Collections: Star Trek: Just in Time Fest





	if all our defenses come down

**Author's Note:**

> Another fic for the Timefest!! It’s once again about running out of time, and the Garashir kisses that happen as a result! 
> 
> The fic starts off with some dialogue from Civil Defense for a reminder of the context.

*

SISKO: What's your status in Ops?

KIRA: We've got about ten minutes before the main reactor core overloads and destroys the station. The only way to stop it is to disengage the laser fusion initiator at one of the control junctions on level thirty-four. But the turbolifts and transporters are offline.

O'BRIEN: They'll never get there in time.

SISKO: But we might. Major, Mister O'Brien and I will handle the reactor. You begin evacuating the station. Get as many people as you can to the _Defiant_ and the runabouts.

KIRA: Understood. Good luck.

*

Kira quickly divided the officers into groups based on where they happened to be currently standing in Ops, and assigned each group a runabout to head to. She told them to self-organize into smaller groups or pairs and split off as they went, so they could cover more ground on their way to their ultimate destination. 

“Now, GO!” Kira shouted, just as an announcement blared:

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTORS WILL OVERLOAD IN TEN MINUTES.`

Everyone scattered. Julian and the group he was in headed out the door that Garak had used to get into Ops. He noticed Garak had joined his group even though he’d been on the other side of the room when Kira had given her instructions.

They reached a junction in the maintenance shaft, and crewmembers started volunteering for routes.

“I’ll get habitat ring level 1,” Ensign Vilix’pran said, heading through an access port into the hallway without waiting for acknowledgement.

“Dr. Bashir and I will take level 2,” Garak announced, surprising Julian and everyone else. But there was no time for anyone to comment on how strange it was for Garak to be following orders meant for the Bajoran and Starfleet officers. 

Garak and Julian broke off from the group and climbed the ladder to the next floor.

Julian suspected that Garak could have left the station at any time. He had been able to pass through the forcefields, and he surely knew where the runabouts were and how to fly them. But instead of saving himself, he had come to Ops, for some reason. Now that Garak had volunteered to go with Julian to help with the evacuation efforts, Julian couldn’t help but wonder if maybe _he_ was the reason Garak had stayed...

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTORS WILL OVERLOAD IN SEVEN MINUTES.`

Garak scanned for nearby lifesigns and directed Julian toward any occupied quarters, and Julian opened doors and relayed evacuation information. The handful of people still left in the habitat ring were discovered to be night shift crew who had been deeply asleep and hadn’t heard the stationwide evacuation announcement.

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTORS WILL OVERLOAD IN FOUR MINUTES.`

“This section is clear,” Garak announced as soon as they’d sent the last of sleepy stragglers on their way.

“Great! Then let’s move on to the next one.”

“My dear Doctor, don’t you think it’s time we escaped ourselves?”

“I won’t just leave people behind, Garak.”

“We don’t even know if there is anybody else left on the station.”

“But there might be.”

“We can’t reach anyone else in time to make a difference. If they’re not already on their way, then they don’t have a chance. They’re already dead. But we don’t have to be. You and I can still make it to the runabout, but we have to go _now_.” Garak held out his hand.

He knew Garak was right, but he just couldn’t justify saving himself over saving others. “You go on ahead. Leave the tricorder with me.”

“My dear Doctor, I’m afraid I’m not going anywhere without you,” Garak said firmly.

Julian bit his lip. After a moment, he took Garak’s offered hand, and they ran.

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTORS WILL OVERLOAD IN TWO MINUTES.`

As they rounded the corner to the runabout pad, Julian dropped Garak’s hand and sprinted ahead to activate the door to the airlock. He pressed the button beside the door, then turned to make sure Garak had caught up. As Garak closed the distance, Julian breathed a sigh of relief that they’d made it.

An alarm buzzed. `ERROR: UNABLE TO COMPLY. AIRLOCK DEPRESSURIZED.`

Julian spun around. His stomach suddenly became a black hole, his whole body threatening to collapse inward on itself. There was nothing beyond the airlock door but stars and the receding twinkle of light that might have been the runabout.

“What do we do?” Julian peeled himself away from the depressing view of the empty runabout pad to look at Garak.

Garak shook his head, completely at a loss.

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTORS WILL OVERLOAD IN NINETY SECONDS.`

Julian deflated and leaned back against the wall of the corridor.

“That’s it, then,” Julian groaned. “We’ll never make it to another runabout in time.” He crumpled slowly to the ground. He’d been in plenty of tough scrapes before, but everything had always worked out in the end. So he had just sort of expected that he would pull through this particular scrape somehow, too. He’d never expected to die this young—he hadn’t made enough significant research contributions in his life, he certainly hadn’t won a Carrington Award at a ripe old age after a long successful career like he’d always wanted, and he hadn’t even made his feelings clear to Garak yet... “I don’t want to die, Garak.”

Garak knelt beside him and took his hands. “The Commander might yet succeed.”— _Garak, the optimist? Me, the pessimist? Never thought I’d see that happen,_ Julian thought—“There’s still time.”

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTORS WILL OVERLOAD IN SIXTY SECONDS.`

Julian winced at the announcement. “Not much.”

“My dear Doctor—”

“Julian. Please. Call me Julian, just this once.” 

“Julian, then... Did you mean what you said in Ops earlier? That I make you smile?”

“Of course I meant it. You always make me smile no matter how dire our circumstances.” Julian beamed at him to prove his point. He was sure it wasn’t his best smile. He was sure the fear in his eyes made his grin look strained and wild and uncertain. But it was the best he could manage at the moment, and he tried to pour everything he had into it, knowing they didn’t have many moments left.

It occurred to Julian that this smile he was putting on for Garak was both obviously a lie and completely true. Julian got caught up in imagining how amusing Garak would find the dual nature of his smile—and, oh, how proud Garak would be that he _finally_ appreciated the malleability of truth—and, for a blissful instant, Julian actually forgot that they were about to die, and let himself get lost in his love for Garak.

The corners of Garak’s lips curved upward as well, into something far more genuine than his usual plain, simple customer service smile. Julian had never seen anything quite like it on his face before, and it was beautiful.

This was a rare display of honesty and vulnerability by Garak’s standards. Julian decided that if they survived this, he would try to do something nice for Garak every day; he wouldn’t wait for a momentous occasion. Julian would shower him with as many compliments and as much affection as Garak could stand. Suddenly nothing seemed more important than letting Garak know that he was loved. Time was too precious to waste, dancing around the feelings he was almost certain they shared for each other. 

Julian pulled Garak into a hug. Garak seemed surprised but leaned into it. They clung to each other, bracing for the end.

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTOR OVERLOAD.`

Right on time, the whole station rattled, and the space outside the airlock glowed briefly orange. Julian closed his eyes and turned away from the bright glow, certain that the explosion would engulf them any moment now.

He started counting the seconds in his head. _1... 2... 3..._ Julian ran his hands reassuringly along Garak’s back. _8..._ _I’m here, I’m with you, Garak... 10..._ Garak squeezed him tight— _14... 15... 16... 17... 18..._ —and Julian felt safe in his arms, safe in a way that was incongruous with their current situation.

`WARNING. MAIN FUSION REACTOR OVERLOAD` _,_ the message repeated after twenty seconds, by Julian’s count.

Julian breathed hard— _24... 25..._ —and pressed his face into Garak’s shoulder. The textured fabric of Garak’s tunic on his cheek grounded him. _29... 30... 31... 32..._

The explosion from the reactor overload should definitely have reached them by now. He pulled his face up, and looked Garak in the eye.

“I think they did it... Garak, I think we’re going to be okay!” Julian said, giddy with relief.

“That’s wonderful news.” As they started to disentangle themselves, Garak’s fingers trailed along Julian’s shoulder and brushed the soft hair on the back of Julian’s neck... and then up, up, until his hand was cradling the back of Julian’s head, and without thinking Julian surged forward.

*

The runabout docked, and the airlock door rolled open with a faint hiss. Kira stepped through the round doorway into the dimly lit station hallway, and nearly tripped as she crossed the threshold. She looked down to find out what the obstacle had been only to discover a tangle of legs. Her stomach lurched as her mind jumped to the worst conclusions. Station residents who hadn’t made it to the runabout in time to evacuate, and had been abandoned only to become casualties of the station’s failing life support system...

But no, life support hadn’t failed yet, and the legs sprawled across the floor appeared to be moving slightly. She visually followed them to her side to find... Bashir? Lying on top of and kissing... Garak?

Kira rolled her eyes. She supposed she shouldn’t be too surprised.

“Hey! Dr. Bashir!” she snapped. Julian startled and rolled off of Garak, landing on his backside, looking up at her with an expression of such embarrassment that she only narrowly managed to suppress a laugh. “You should probably take this back to one of your quarters.”

Julian opened his mouth to respond—

“Ohhh, Julian, congratulations,” Jadzia said as she poked her head out of the airlock door. She turned to Garak, and whispered conspiratorially, “He’s been wanting to kiss you for awhile now.”

“Jadzia!!”

“It’s true,” she said innocently, raising her shoulders and her burned hands in a shrug.

“Well, yes, but—”

“Come on, get up off the floor you two,” Kira interrupted curtly, but still fighting to keep the amusement off her face. “There’s about to be a big crowd of people leaving the runabout, and you’re in the way.”

Julian scrambled awkwardly to his feet. He offered a hand to Garak, who seemed to be frozen in place due to his mortification, though he began to thaw as Julian’s fingers interlaced gently with his.

“Jadzia,” Julian said, as he helped Garak to stand up, “I need to get you to the infirmary to heal those burns—”

“Julian, don’t worry about me... I’m sure any of the medical staff can take care of my hands, but I think you’re the only one who can _take care of_ Garak,” Jadzia said with a wink, and Julian was sure he’d soon need burn treatment too based on how hot his cheeks felt. Jadzia headed off in the direction of the infirmary before Julian could protest that they’d only been kissing.

A crowd of people were in fact disembarking from the runabout now. Julian distractedly watched them stream past for a minute, trying to think of some kind of comeback to Jadzia’s teasing even though the moment was long past. He slowly became aware that he and Garak were still holding hands. It was a pleasant sort of awareness. Julian glanced over at Garak, and noticed that he still looked a bit stunned and distracted himself. A smile crept onto Julian’s face, and he gently squeezed Garak’s hand.

Julian hit his combadge. “Bashir to Medical staff, alpha shift. Get a team to the control junctions on level 34. Commander Sisko, Chief O’Brien, and Jake Sisko might need medical attention. Lt. Dax is headed to the infirmary for burn treatment. I’m placing Nurse Jabara in charge for the rest of the shift. Bashir out.”

After he closed the connection, he turned to Garak and said as charmingly as he could, “All right, I think we have some things we ought to talk about, Garak. Perhaps over tea, in my quarters?”

“I’d be delighted, my dear Doctor.”

“Julian,” he corrected.

“My dear Julian.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the incomparable [Primal_Nexus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Primal_Nexus/pseuds/Primal_Nexus) for beta reading! <3
> 
> Title is based on lyrics from [Lay It On Me by Vance Joy](https://www.youtube.com/watch/VXXD1Qxpisw).
> 
> Kaelio made a [post](https://kaelio.tumblr.com/post/640886347890065408/theres-a-lot-to-love-about-deep-space-9) recently about how Garak absolutely could have escaped at any time during the events of Civil Defense and chose not to, so that post plus the timefest are what rattled around inside my head to inspire this fic!
> 
> If you like this, feel free to also check out my other timefest fic, [the spy who married me](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28864239). An extremely silly OMB Garashir fic with a huge helping of mutual pining.
> 
> Also go read all the other [timefest fics in the collection](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/justintimefest)!!!! The ones I have read so far have been spectacular!


End file.
